I have been contemplating of the ways I can improve myself that I came to realize the regrets and hurts I have within me. There are moments that I would feel so bitter about certain things or I would simply start to cry as if for no reason. There are days were I feel so low that I would try to blame it on others. There are times that I would simply show anger that I end up hurting those I love. With these realizations in mind, I have learned different ways to forgive myself in order to release any negative emotions bottled up inside me.
- Accepting the fact that I make mistakes. Learning to accept my flaws and knowing that despite my flaws, I am loved as I am. I realized that my flaws are what makes me who I am and it should not make me less of a person. Accepting my mistakes and failures leads to self-improvement.
- Having someone I can talk to.Talking to someone definitely helps me feel better. I feel that do not need assurance from others that I am okay. However, it feels good to have someone who sacrifices their time to comfort you; someone who willingly lends an ear; and someone who is there for you no matter what.
- Knowing what needs to be change about myself. I realized that doing daily reflections at the end of the day helps me see the things that I could have done better and things that I should do to better myself. Being a business student, I learned about the SWOT analysis that I try to apply it in my life. Since I know my strengths, I use them to strengthen my weaknesses and develop them into strengths. I check for opportunities to help better myself and I look out for the threats (e.g. negative thoughts/overthinking) that may hinder my opportunity to help myself to become a better person.
- Trying to make my mistakes right.Finding ways to make my mistakes right is another way to forgive myself. If I hurt someone, I try to reach out to that person and I apologize. If I am unable to reach a person, showing kindness to someone else definitely makes me feel better. Doing good to others rather than feeling bad is a great way to forgive yourself.
- Giving myself a break.Giving my mind and my body a break from all the guilt or regret by finding happiness in other things is a helpful process of forgiving myself. Reading a book, writing, walking in the park, praying, or listening to music are some of the things I do when giving myself a break. At times, I would simply stop and think of how grateful I am to be alive and knowing that there are people who loves me and cares for me.
No one is perfect – yes. I make mistakes like anyone else in this world. Forgiving yourself is a learning process. Truly, there are other ways for me to learn how to forgive myself.
I have learned that sometimes “sorry” is not enough. Sometimes you actually have to change.- Claire London
Do you have ways or processes of forgiving yourself? Feel free to share them with me!
4 Comments Add yours
Saying sorry is a way to say that we know we were wrong and we want to change that. In the long run, that isn’t enough, but your tips help a lot!
I was surprised to see the SWOT applied to self-development, I kind of think in the same way. One time I gave a class where people had to find their strengths, weaknesses and then the opportunities and threats as well. So they could improve and be better persons.
My favourite part, though, was the last point: giving yourself a break. I believe most people forget this. We are allowed to feel negative, as long as we don’t sink into it.
Great content! 🙂
Have the best day ever,
An excellent topic for self-reflection. I agree that forgiveness is not so much about forgiving others as forgiving yourself! Here’s my forgiveness approach: Learn from the experience. Apologize and/or otherwise admit your error and then reflect on what you would do next time that situation occurred. Don’t beat yourself up. Tell yourself, “That’s not like me. Next time if it occurs here’s what I’ll do (spell out your behavior here).”
And thanks for following my 80Insights blog. I look forward to seeing your comments and viewpoints on my blog posts.
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Thank you Jerry! I will definitely keep that in mind.